One and Done?

I’ve seen a few of my family members and friends struggling and coping with getting pregnant, miscarriage, or even losing their babies that were healthily born. Some of them had to wait for so many years before getting one. Some had to go in and out of the fertility clinic, and not getting any good news at every visit. Some of them had to deal with losing their baby at 32-week pregnancy. Some of them miscarried at the early stage. Some had to terminate the pregnancy due to medical reasons. Some lose their babies to SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome).

I could only make dua’a for them and continuously support them in each and every way. I know it’s not easy for them, although they are so brave to put on a smile and still turn up to work and face life. I don’t even know how I will react if I’m in their shoes.

Allah says in the Quran:

Allah does not charge a soul except [with that within] its capacity. (Al-Baqarah 2:286)

I understood their struggles. We are struggling too. Who wouldn’t want kids? They are the coolness of our eyes. My husband and I, we are talking about getting a second baby for quite some time now. We are not using any birth control since our firstborn, so it’s quite a record that we naturally have a 4 year gap, or probably alarming that I should get myself check. But we know that it all depends on Allah SWT plan for us, and all that we could do is put our effort and ikhtiar. We know that child-bearing is a form of direct blessing from Allah SWT, as recorded in the Quran:

To him [alone] is attributed knowledge of the Hour. And fruits emerge not from their coverings nor does a female conceive or give birth except with His knowledge. (Fussilat 41:47)

Which also means that we are ready (or probably I am ready) if it meant only having one child. We are okay if it’s just ‘one and done’ for us. Adriana has been nothing but a true blessing for us, and we are truly grateful for her. She is an amanah for us from Allah SWT.

May Allah SWT ease our struggle and give us strength and preserverence in coping with our challenges.

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My Ideal Working Day

One of the most common stressors is starting a new job, but lucky for me I adapt well to changes. I was stressed – no denying it – but I also work best under pressure, so alhamdulillah I think I delivered (and keep delivering) my tasks as per expectations from the superiors. I love the opportunity to learn new things and at the same time shaping an effective and efficient team (I’m sure they hate me by now) – I basically love my job.

For me, having a job that we truly love is also a form of rizq from Allah SWT. It gives you a sense of purpose and ownership in life. It gives you a reason to wake up in the morning. You continually have goals and always trying to over-deliver, not only for the organization for also for your own self-satisfaction. Can you imagine the satisfaction it gives knowing that you truly deserve the paychecks, and from that paychecks you are providing halal rizq to your kids and parents? I find my motivation in that.

But the only thing I need to work on is having a balanced life. I know, I know, when I’m too focus at work, I tend to neglect one very important thing – self-love. I focus too much on works and on others, but I forgot to love myself first. It is true that you can only love a person as much as you love yourself.

So knowing me, I work well with a strict daily schedule (nerd, I know). I need to have strict daily timetable, strict meal plan, strict everything to make it works, and only then I know I can achieve a balanced lifestyle, insyaAllah.

Ideally, my working day should look like this:

4:00 AM : Wake up, prayer, read Quran

4:30 AM : Exercise for 30 minutes

5:00 AM : Subuh prayer, shower, morning skincare routine

5:30 AM : Read for 30 minutes

6:00 AM : Journal my thought/ plan for the day

6:15 AM : Makeup, wake my daughter up for school

7:00 AM : Breakfast

8:00 AM : Send my daughter to school, go to work

12.00 PM : Pick up my daughter from school, have lunch with her

1.30 PM : Zuhur prayer

2.00 PM : Back to work

4.00 PM :  Asar prayer, continue work

5.30 PM : Gym

7:00 PM : Back from gym, Maghrib prayer, shower

7:30 PM : Dinner

8:00 PM : Isya’ prayer, put my daughter to bed

9:00 PM : Work from home, Quran journal, learn Arabic, write blog

10:00 PM : Night time skincare routine, sleep

I know, it’s only 6 hours of sleep, but 6-hour works for me because believe me, I’ve slept lesser in the past. 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep is a luxury for me. And I’m lucky too I don’t have to deal with much cooking during weekdays because I have my aunty to help me with that (but I compensate with cooking during the weekends, okay? #fyimakcikbawang) And I have Dyson, so yeah you can imagine how clean my house is at all time #itslikehavingamaid #lieitellmyselfeachday

It’s just how I envision my day to be. Being a working parent is not easy. Being a working mom is even harder. So of course I will allow a lil bit of indulgence and rewards here and there 😉

Tell me how you make your working day exciting.

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